When I was diagnosed with lung cancer, I had to quit doing my most favorite thing in the world - playing agility with my dogs. I simply didn't have the strength or the stamina for it. It broke my heart because when I quit doing agility, I also quit hearing much from the people I thought were my friends. Unfortunately, there are lots of things about cancer than cause pain besides tumors. Losing your friends, or those you considered friends but who turned out to be acquaintances, is one of the hardest. I've been fighting this battle for over 2-1/2 years and it still hurts.
But, that's not what this post is about. I quit doing agility, but I was determined to have something to do to occupy my thoughts. I refuse to dwell on the fact that I have lung cancer. I spent quite a lot of time in my backyard. It is a peaceful, happy place. I love it back there. I bought lots of pretty flowers and hung bird feeders.
The flowers brought color to my world and the birds that visited my feeders brought joy. I didn't have any energy, but it didn't take any to sit in the backyard and enjoy what God has created. In fact, spending time relaxing in all of the beauty rejuvenated me.
Pretty soon, I decided I wanted to capture the memories so I brought the camera out. With the help of an excellent photographer friend of mine from Midland, I practiced using the various settings on the camera. What I haven't learned - then or now - is how to use any of the software that allows you to REALLY enhance your work. I know I need to learn, but I always put it off. Chemo brain dissuades me from doing many things that require a great deal of learning and concentration.
I seem to be getting distracted a lot tonight. Tonight's post is titled "Pictures from the Backyard" and that's what I want to talk about!
Throughout my journey, I have snapped a lot of shots in my backyard. I am a prolific picture taker and I am not usually inclined to get rid of any of them! I have thousands and thousands of pictures. Don't start groaning! I don't intend to post them all here!
But, I took some today that I want to share because I enjoyed taking them and I enjoyed seeing them when I loaded them onto the computer. I hope you might enjoy them as well.
Abstract! I did this by spinning the lens while the shutter was open. I like it!
This is the flower that is in the center of the spin art above. It is a Dahlia.
This bud will ultimately open into a bloom like the one above. Beautiful!
Canna and Asiatic lilies -- bring joy to my life!
Close-up of the canna.
Asiatic lilies. They are gorgeous, but they really don't last very long. I enjoy them while they are blooming!
I take lots of pictures of the little lemons. They fascinate me!
A butterfly weed
Another butterfly weed
A close-up of the bud above. I love all of the teeny flowers!
A third butterfly weed. The three butterfly weed plants are supposed to attract monarch butterflies and give them a place to lay their eggs. Unfortunately, I have seen not one butterfly on the plants. Lots of flies and bees though. You'll see those later :)
A beautiful dianthus bloom. Right after a rainstorm.
More dianthus. I love these little flowers that just keep on keeping on.
This picture and the one above are lemon tree blooms. You have missed a true blessing if you have never gotten to smell lemon tree blooms. They smell so good! And, they're beautiful, I think.
Close-up of a marigold. My marigolds have not enjoyed the torrential rains we have had lately.
Cool Shots
I love playing with the camera. The following shots are me playing. Just practicing and playing!
A raindrop about to fall)
Flies and bees love this flower.
Flies? Bees? Very lovely green color, whatever they are!
This flower is supposed to attract butterflies and bees. Instead, there are flies, flies, and more flies!
Same for these flowers. They are supposed to attract butterflies/hummers. Instead, I get flies and whatever the green bug is!
This butterfly just happened to fly up when I was outside taking pictures. Think he is pretty (in a dull sort of way) so I followed him from plant to plant taking his picture!
For years, Robert has asked me to have a vegetable garden. Every time he suggested it, I refused to even consider it. I was totally opposed to such an idea. Until this year.
Perhaps it has to do with life. I am living and it is fun to see other things live? Too philosophical? Well, I don't know why I suddenly decided this year that it would be a great idea to grow some fruits and vegetables, but that's what I decided.
Meyer Lemon Tree
First, I bought a lemon tree! Yep, a lemon tree. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade and all of that :) Seriously, I love lemons - lemon in water, lemon in shrimp scampi, lemon in cake!!! And, I was jealous when I would see friends with their homegrown lemons in years past, so I just had to buy myself a lemon tree.
This picture is from when I first got the tree when it was full of blooms instead of fruit ... I'll have to get another one day soon. At any rate, the tree is now just full of little fruit and it also has started flowering again. And, if you have never smelled lemon tree blossoms, you are missing something really special. They smell heavenly. I am excited to see more blossoms! Who knew a tree would try to fruit more than once in a season?
Aren't the little fruits just as cute as can be? As they get larger and larger, I wonder if the thin little branch will be able to support the weight? Lemons I buy at the store are pretty heavy! That branch is really thin!
The blooms are not only fragrant, they are gorgeous! I could look at these blooms forever. Butterflies like them, too. So far, I can think of lots of reasons why everyone should have a lemon tree (even if you don't like them, putting them in your disposal will make your house smell good!) and none for why you shouldn't. Possibly the fact that they are very cold sensitive and will have to be brought into the house in the winter is a negative. Not for me, but maybe for others...
Here in Dallas, we don't usually get a lot of rain, but let me tell you, this year we have had rain after rain after rain! And some fairly violent weather nearby with hail and tornadoes. I like rain. I do not like hail or tornadoes. Tornadoes scare me and hail just makes me mad. Anyway, I loved the water dripping off of my little lemon here. Isn't it fascinating that the lemon already has a rough texture like store-bought lemons do? Am I too easily entertained?
I took this picture just to show how the tree has fruit on it and new blooms too. I think that is so cool!
Well, from the lemon tree came the herb garden!
Herb Garden
I don't really like to cook, but since I took a BIG pay cut when I quit working, I have been trying to do more of it. So, I got the brilliant idea that fresh herbs would be a wonderful idea. I went to a herb garden class at our local nursery where I bought this really neat three-level pot. I fell in love with it!
I bought quite a variety of herbs: parsley (did you know that parsley is really, really good for you?), oregano, chives (garlic and onion), chocolate mint, peppermint, lemon balm (supposed to keep mosquitoes away, but it is not working for me!), rosemary, sage, thyme, lavender and I can't remember what else. I have the tags and I look at them on occasion to remind myself what herbs I have growing!! It is obvious from the ones I remember I have that I like Italian food! :)
If one three-level pot is good, two will be better, right? That's what I decided. It was buying the second pot that started me on fruit and vegetables. I decided that a tomato plant in the top pot was a great idea. And it was!
I chose a compact patio tomato to plant in the top pot of the planter. The fruit is supposed to be dwarf, between the size of a cherry tomato and a regular tomato. I think you can see that the plant is growing nicely. That is a 12 inch wooden stake next to it, trying to offer it a bit of support.
Here is what that little tomato plant has on it now:
It has had this fruit for a month or two. It isn't ripening. I don't know why. If anyone reads this and knows how long it takes for tomatoes to ripen on the vine, please let me know in the comments!!! I am the world's least patient person so this "farming" is a real test for me!!! I go outside every single day and look at every plant, every single plant! And boy! Do I get excited when I find a surprise!
Fruits and Veggies
Well, it was so much fun to have one tomato plant, that I decided I needed more. I thought we would enjoy the dwarf tomatoes in salad, but I also wanted fruit that could be sliced for hamburgers and sandwiches.
And, yeah, I decided I would also like to have strawberries, even though I am not a big strawberry lover. Don't ask me why I made some of the decisions I made. I can't explain it to myself, much less to you!
Robert is good about indulging my "needs," so off we went to Lowe's, where we purchased not one, but three new tomato plants and a lovely strawberry plant. (I previously planted strawberry roots ... 30 of them. Not a single one ever made into a plant. Again, if anyone has hints on that, I would love to hear them. The roots were guaranteed to grow, but not one did! I obviously did something very, very wrong!)
I also bought a Patio Picker container. I put all four plants (3 tomatoes, one strawberry) in the same 24X20" container. Yeah, I know, that was a mistake! Those tiny little tomato plants have EXPLODED in size!!!
Well, it probably comes as no surprise that one Patio Picker container and tomatoes would not enough. If we are going to be "farmers," we need to grow some veggies. Right? Right!
Let's see. What would be good this summer? Well, I don't much like watermelon, but I have read it is really, REALLY good for you. Better have some watermelon. And some cantaloupe. Another fruit I don't like, but everyone else I know does, especially my mom and Robert. Maybe I'll learn to like it better. Or not.
I like okra and so does Robert. So, let's get some okra. Zucchini and squash are awesome on the grill or in salads. Better have some of those. And cucumber. Yum! It is another vegetable that is just packed with goodness for you.
Sigh!!! I wish I had a bigger place for stuff because I wouldn't mind trying some beans, too. But, for now we have all our space can handle. Except that I talked myself into a red bell pepper while I was buying the other plants.
Here are my two Patio Pickers side by side right after they were planted on April 28. As an aside, I am not using the pots the way you are instructed. You are supposed to cover the tops with plastic to keep the plants from being over-watered and to keep water from evaporating so quickly. That seemed like a hassle to me so I just put mulch on top. So far, even with the torrential rains we have had day after day after day, the plants are doing AWESOME.
The picture above show what a couple of weeks can mean!!! Wow! Even I forgot that it had only been a few weeks since I planted my Patio Pickers!!! Look at the size of the tomato plants now!! One of them is coming out of its wire frame already and another will be in another few days. The third one, a more compact variety, surprised me yesterday. It already has some decent-sized fruit on it!!!
The tomatoes are not the only thing that is exploding in size!!! I was gone last weekend because I was attending the fabulous LUNGevity National HOPE Summit in Washington, DC. I was only gone from Friday afternoon until Sunday night, but I was astonished at how big my vegetables in the Patio Pickers had grown. After another week of growth, they're even bigger now!
In the Patio Picker above are some yellow zucchini, cantaloupe (I think), red bell pepper, okra, and two plants that don't have tags on them so I won't know what they are until they produce!! It's a mystery until then! Don't you love it? (And yes! These plants are going to be WAY too crowded. But, I think it might be too late to repot them. Does anyone know?)
Well, until today, I didn't think any of the vegetable plants were actually producing. But, I was wrong!
Do you see it? My teeny tiny yellow zucchini!!! There are actually three that I can see on the plant so far. They're small, but they're there!!! I was as excited as could be when I found them. I have taken pictures of them with my tablet and then again with my better camera! I will probably take pictures of them now every single day until I pick them. Anybody's guess when that will be! I have no clue!
Some of the other plants in the Patio Picker look like they'll be producing soon, too. Just for fun, here are a few more pictures I took of the plants in the Patio Picker (should I just call it a PP? ... much easier ... though some children might laugh if you were reading this out loud).
No clue what this is going to be, but I'm going to have something soon! Hopefully, I will be able to identify it fairly quickly once I can see a vegetable. Or maybe someone reading this knows?
I believe this is the cantaloupe. And, I'm not actually sure if a fruit will appear where I have pictured or not. Time will tell. I am expecting SOMETHING to appear pretty soon, somewhere on the plant!
My baby zucchini again. I can't wait to watch it grow!
These are going to be red bell peppers. I am really anxious to see they grow too! Well, let's just be honest! There isn't a single vegetable or fruit here that I'm not anxious to see grow!
The Planted Garden
Well, when I do something, I usually don't do it in a small fashion. Whatever hobby I have, I do it with full engagement. That's not a good thing most of the time. But, it is what it is.
So, I was thinking that I wanted to put some vegetables into the ground. But, our yard is really not set up for a garden. It is three levels. The first level, near the house, is small and very sloped. There is an old pond that has a leaking liner where I could probably toss some dirt ... and probably will next year! But otherwise, there really aren't many places for flowers or gardens, except in containers ... and I have the fence lined with those!
The second level is the most plausible level to become home to a garden. We rarely go down there. The dogs run the fence line, barking at people who walk on the nature trail, and Cotton digs lots of landmines there. On rare occasions, I set up some jumps and practice a little agility. But, for the most part, it is underused, even unused. It is currently home to some grass and some weeds. No flowers, except the ones on the weeds. Digging out a garden plot on the second level was a little too industrious for me this year.
The third level of our yard is not fenced and is next to the nature trail. Unless I want to share my vegetables with everybody who walks by, I think the third level is out. Unless we put up some sort of fence with a locking gate... The second level still seems most plausible. Next year.
For this year, the only space I could think of was a weed-ridden little plot next to the swimming pool. It had a tree in it when we moved here, but Robert cut it down right away. Who plants a tree right next to a swimming pool? Hello? Roots under the pool? We didn't know much about swimming pools when we moved here, but we knew you don't want tree roots pushing against it or growing up under it.
The little plot has been home to weeds for the entire time we've lived here. You can't see them because the land is two or three feet below where the pool deck is. In other words, in order to get to it, you have to climb down to get to it ... and yeah, climb back up when you want to get out of there.
Well, it isn't the most convenient spot on earth, to be sure, but it is a place where I can have my veggies. There is plenty of sun. Nothing should bother the plants (except maybe bugs).
I spent a couple of hard days digging out the weeds, adding soil conditioners, and sprinkling in fertilizer. I patted myself on the back more than once while I was out there sweating and hurting. I'm a Stage IV lung cancer survivor and I can dig this garden with the best of them! Yeah! And even though I am no spring chicken any more, I can also climb in and out of this space! I have to crawl and then stand up when I get out of it, but that's beside the point entirely!
Below are pictures of the little garden right after I got it planted and mulched. I'm hoping the mulch will limit the amount of weeding I have to do. And, also, it should help keep the ground moist when it is no longer raining every single solitary day like it is now.
The pipes are either just hanging around down there or are taking the overflow from the pool out to the area between our houses. The pool is saltwater so I hope the water from it doesn't end up in my garden plot. I don't think any of the plants will be fans of saltwater. And, as an aside, neither is the metal fence.
When I planted the little garden space, I actually tried to give the vegetables a reasonable amount of space. I think I knew, even as I was planting them, that I was going to be crowding the ones in the Patio Pickers.
Because it is a pain to get up and down out of the space, the plants in the ground do not get nearly as much scrutiny or attention as the ones in the Patio Pickers. Today was the first day in awhile that I have been down in the garden to really take a look at them.
They are not growing as quickly as the ones in the Patio Pickers. But, they ARE growing. Some of the plants were really tiny when I planted them. Below are some pictures I took today:
Well, I guess I didn't get a picture of the whole garden. I'll have to go do that. Because it is fun to see how it grows! So far, there is no fruit or vegetables on any of the plants that are in the ground. The fact that the container plants are doing so much better is a great advertisement for Patio Pickers!!!! I should set it up an affiliate link so I can make a commission for bragging on them like I am!! :)
I got industrious. I went outside with the tablet to try to get a picture of the garden. I can't get it all in one photo, so I decided to take a video! So, you get pictures and commentary!
I am really having a lot of fun with this right now! I should have fruits and vegetables to share soon unless something awful happens and kills them all. Since I have no idea what I am doing, anything is possible, but I'm going to hope that all goes well with it and that my biggest problem is going to be getting rid of the produce!
Do any of you garden? Anyone have tips or favorite web sites for me?
You know, I try to stay really upbeat most of the time. I am fairly successful at it. Like Dann Wonser says, most trials and tribulations we lung cancer survivors face are very tiny, while cancer is VERY BIG. (http://www.dannwonser.com/blog/a-little-disaster-can-be-a-good-thing/5/4/2015 ... you really HAVE to read this, it is hilarious!). I think many cancer patients agree that we no longer sweat the small stuff ... and most everything we face in our lives besides cancer is small stuff.
The article was written by Myra Arthur, an anchor/reporter for ABC affiliate KSAT-12, a San Antonio, TX affiliate. Ms Arthur questions, as do I, why funding for lung cancer research trails so far behind that of other cancers, especially breast and prostate. Her advocacy makes me wonder if somehow her life, too, hasn't been touched by lung cancer. Most people ignore it otherwise. That's just the sad fact.
Facts - Ho Hum ... But Necessary!
Here are some facts about cancer - some good, some not so good:
1. The two largest federal agencies that fund cancer research are the National Cancer Institute and the Department of Defense. These two agencies funded breast cancer research at $802 million in 2014. Prostate cancer research received $334 million.
2. Breast cancer is expected to be found in 234,190 men and women in 2015. (That's right! Men can get breast cancer, too!) During 2015, 40,730 people are expected to die from breast cancer. That's too many, for sure, but basically, if you get breast cancer, you have very good odds of surviving at least five years. These odds have increased exponentially over the past few years as more and more attention has been given to the disease.
A whopping 29% of all cancers diagnosed will be breast cancer. About 15% of all cancer deaths result from breast cancer.
3. Prostate cancer is the most common cancer among men. It nearly seems like every man is going to be diagnosed with it if they live to be old enough. I have gotten so cavalier about it ... "oh! prostate cancer. minor inconvenience. treat it. be done." I wasn't quite so sure of myself when one of our very best friends died from it only months after diagnosis. (I think he waited REALLY long before seeking treatment and it had metastasized throughout his body.)
So, the facts for prostate cancer are: 220,800 men are expected to be diagnosed with prostate cancer during 2015. Prostate cancer will account for 9% of all cancer-related deaths this year.
4. And then there's lung cancer. Research funding from the two major federal agencies for this disease during 2014 was a whopping $265.6 million. Let's remember. Breast cancer got $802 million and prostate got $334 million. Hello????
During 2015, it is estimated that 115,610 men and 105,590 women (total of 221,200) will be diagnosed with lung cancer. Most of these diagnoses will be late stage because lung cancer typically doesn't make itself known until it has metastasized. It is somewhat treatable if found in early stages, but in late stages, the prognosis is downright bad.
Lung cancer is expected to claim the lives of 86,380 men (that's 28% of all cancer deaths) and 71,660 women (26% of all cancer deaths) for a total of 158,040 people succumbing to lung cancer in 2015. An awful lot of families are losing their children, their moms and dads, and/or their grandparents to this insidious disease.
So, the likelihood that you'll get breast cancer if you are a woman or prostate cancer if you are a man is somewhat greater than that you'll get lung cancer. Pray that you get one of these cancers and not lung cancer. Because, if you get breast cancer, you have an 89% chance of surviving at least five years. Prostate cancer has even better odds. Over 99% of prostate cancer survivors will still be living life in five years.
But, if you are one of the unlucky ones who gets the lung cancer diagnosis, you have much worse odds. Let's just take a quote right out of Cancer Facts and Figures 2015, a publication of the American Cancer Society:
The 1- and 5-year relative survival rates for lung cancer
are 44% and 17%, respectively. Only 15% of lung cancers are
diagnosed at a localized stage, for which the 5-year survival rate
is 54%. More than half (57%) are diagnosed at a distant stage, for
which the 1- and 5-year survival is 26% and 4%, respectively. The
5-year survival for small cell lung cancer (6%) is lower than that
for non-small cell (21%).
So, does this make any sense to you? Because it sure does not make sense to me. It breaks my heart at the same time as it totally infuriates me.
Did you know that ONE in FIFTEEN will be diagnosed with lung cancer? Those are some pretty scary stats. Most of us have more than 15 people in our circle of family and friends. That means you are very likely to be directly affected by lung cancer. Either because a loved one is diagnosed or because you, yourself, get that news someday. When the word comes that you or your loved one has lung cancer, I wonder if you are going to wish more had been spent on lung cancer research? Because right now, the odds that you will live even one year after lung cancer is found in your body are very, very slim.
There is no stigma associated with getting breast cancer or prostate cancer or colon cancer or, I suppose, any other cancer. But, people in general seem to think that people who get lung cancer deserve it. After all, isn't lung cancer the disease of smokers? People know they are testing fate when they pick up those cigarettes. So, let them just suffer the consequences of their actions. Right?
Well ... first of all ... NO ONE and I do mean NO ONE deserves to get cancer of any kind. It is a fact of life, I guess, that most all of us will be impacted in some way by cancer if we live long enough, but none of us really deserve to get it.
It is NOT a fun disease to treat. People are sick, sick, sick. And often lose their hair. And all of their energy. And their memory.
And, it is certainly not a cheap disease to treat. One ... ONE chemo treatment that I had cost over $34,000 and that was after a $22,000 grant. I had those treatments every 3 weeks for six or seven months. And, that was just the cost of the drug. It didn't include doctor, blood tests, or facility usage. Cancer can wipe a family out financially in no time.
But, back to the stigma associated with lung cancer. Did you know that 60 to 65% of all lung cancer survivors (because you become a survivor from the moment you are diagnosed) either have never smoked or are former smokers? In my case, I had quit 5 years previously. My cancer is one that both smokers and non-smokers get so there is no clear evidence that my smoking caused my cancer.
I attended a LUNGevity HOPE Summit in Washington, DC last week. I was amazed at the 150 survivors at that event. One girl was only 20. Her late stage lung cancer was found (finally) when she was 19. Another beauty was 24. She lost part of a lung to lung cancer. Heart-breaking. Neither girl smoked. Both were gorgeous. Both were physically fit. Both girls had such a difficult time convincing their doctors that there was something more than asthma going on that they didn't have their cancer discovered until it had metastasized.
Even doctors have an erroneous image in their heads as to what a lung cancer patient looks like. So, while they are lollygagging along treating symptoms and never even entertaining the idea that there might be something more serious going on, the cancer cells are spreading all over the body.
I met men and women who bicycle hundreds of miles a weekend. Coaches. Vegetarians. Physically fit, well-nourished, non-smokers. Lots of them. Lung cancer survivors, one and all. I don't know that an average age for the attendees was calculated, but I would guess it was around 45, maybe even less.
All of this is to say that your mind's image of a lung cancer patient is probably wrong. He or she is probably as physically fit as you are. And is probably not as old as you imagined. And definitely likely does not have tobacco stained fingers that are still shakily raising that nasty cigarette up to be smoked. He or she might be your sister or your brother, your mom or your dad or your best friend. Or you.
The stigma that just won't go away STINKS. Worse than cigarettes and we all know how bad they stink.
It is causing doctors to misdiagnose or delay diagnosis until the odds of survival have decreased to almost nothing. It is causing the general public to think it is fine to underfund lung cancer research. It is causing a lot of people to die deaths they don't deserve.
The Good News
The news is BAD when we look at funding, awareness, and the number of people being diagnosed and dying from lung cancer. There really are not a lot of optimistic things to say about those things.
But, in spite of the limited funding, our scientists and oncologists are making significant progress. This is an exciting time in the research field. They are on the brink of making some discoveries that could change some of those dire statistics.
At the HOPE Summit, we heard from some of the up and coming talents in the world of lung cancer research and they were inspiring. We have targeted therapy drugs coming. Immunotherapies. Perhaps even some chemo therapies that will be less toxic. I can't imagine the inroads that would or could be made if only lung cancer was given a significant amount of funding like the other two major cancers get.
There are a few groups out there working hard to raise awareness. As awareness is raised, perhaps more big corporations and names will jump on the bandwagon. CVS has recently begun a campaign to raise money for lung cancer. It is the first corporation I know of to begin backing such a campaign. As awareness is raised, there will be more money for research. But, there will also be more lives saved because the image of the old smoker with lung cancer will be replaced by the young vital nonsmoker with lung cancer. People will begin to realize that they are not immune to it just because they never smoked. And then we'll have real progress. It is a day I hope I live to see and I have developed a passion for doing what I can to help that day come sooner rather than later.
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